Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Saturday, 16 September 2006

Dropped off parcels at the hospital. Spoke to the sister who was there the day dad came out of surgery. Didn't want to stay long. Vincent said that his mom is in the wards now.
Kerin made us a delicious chicken lasagne. Mervin said that him and Andrew will do us a security gate. Uncle Robbie came to visit and stayed late, chatting telling us stories of Dad and the good old days. Such a good laugh. Very tired, need a nice rest, we are all going to church tomorrow.

Thank you Lord. Thank you for the memories. It is all still a bit unreal. I miss my dad and want him to come home. I want my dad back. Please send him our love.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Friday, 15 September 2006

Woke up, unable to get out of bed. So tired. My body is wrecked. Went to make arrangements at Doves. They really take care of everything. It was quite difficult to choose hymns and write a message. How do you sum up a persons life in one paragraph? I do hope that all his friends put in messages for him. There weren't a lot of visitors at the hospital, but I know he was well liked. Dad, I really hope your funeral is beautiful. It is so difficult to plan something without going OTT and still make it special. I hope that it is what you would have liked. We are all still so tired.
No real family coming round and spending time with us, but I guess we have never been that way. Maureen Kelly & Rita luckily brought us food. Thank you Lord for the strength you have given us, but I am finished. I hope to get a good nights sleep.
Morag said that she strengthened my heart & solar plexus. Very kind of her.
Oi vey my brain is fried.
Got flowers, and phone calls from my special friends.

Thank you Lord. Please send angels to care for my dad.

After such a long vigil, we didn't know what to do with ourselves. So we planned a funeral. I just wanted to get past all the formalities of the situation. I wanted this all over with.
We made up hampers for the nurses to say thank you for everything they had done. We did not know how to just be.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Thursday, 14 September 2006

What a day. What a rollercoaster. Spent the day with dad. He fought all day, struggling with his breath. Aunty Kath and Uncle Brian spent a few hours with us. At about 5, 6ish Dad stopped breathing twice. His heart was still going strong though. We all sat around dad and told him that we were ready, he could let go, we love him, we are proud of him. We all cried and cried. He was struggling to breathe, and his breathe would stop, and he would open his eyes and see mom and gasp for air. He was staying strong for us. Then we went out for them to get dad ready for bed, the old ladies went back in and we stayed and chatted to the son and daughter of the bad lung lady. As the ladies left, mom walked them out and then Brad and Georgie went in. Dad was alone for a few moments and I think he took the chance. His heart rate dropped immediately and Georgie ran to get us. His heart stopped and we desperately sent Shaun to find mom. Dad kept his heart beating until mom arrived and then it was over. So quickly. He was too proud to let us see him give up. I remember saying, Thank you dad, thank you for everything! It was over so fast and I am so glad.
Dad is finally resting, he is flying without wings. Free from his body, free from pain and heartache and suffering. I am so happy for my dad. I too can rest easy now. I cannot comprehend how difficult life will be without my dad. It is all very surreal.
He is still so much a part of us and our lives, things are going to be too quiet. We really got on dad, didn't we? Despite our differences, I really enjoyed the time we spent together. Wasn't I lucky? I felt a special bond to you dad, but I think we all bonded to you for different reasons. I have never experienced anything quite like this and I don't quite know what is next. I can only thank the Lord above that all of us had time to prepare. It was so difficult seeing dad fighting, so, so strong. He just kept going, where he found the strength I will never know. But to know how sick his body was too, made it all so difficult to watch. For the end to be so drawn out.

Rest in peace my dad. We love you.
Enjoy paradise!

We are so tired, we are finished.

My brothers friend Shaun was kind enough to bring us dinner. We sat and ate in the waiting room with a brother and sister whose mother was in ICU too. She had severe lung problems and was unable to breath. We shared stories of ICU.
My dad absolutely hated being on a ventilator. And so he fought for every last breath and eventually it was his heart that gave out. And he was too proud to give up on us. He waited for a quiet moment when we had left him alone. He was too proud.
Death is a very strange and unsentimental. Immediately after my dad moved on, I could feel that he was no longer there and felt no attachment to his body, which didn't look like him either anymore.
We all felt a tiny bit of relief, we could exhale after so long, Dad would finally be okay. It was certain.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Wednesday, 13 September 2006

Sat with dad all day. Cried about what a good man he was, cried about how sick he is, how he keeps fighting. Cried when he saw Brad. Cried now when Georgie phoned to say that his kidneys have failed. My dad! Why this? Why? I never thought he would fight so hard to stay alive. Its hard sitting by his side all day, but it'll be harder when he goes. I love my dad so much. I am so proud of him. The priest gave dad last rites today. I don't remember much. Robbie made us cry. By the time the sun went down, I was spent. His bp is really low, but the deterioration is very slow. I thought is would go faster. I don't know if this is better or worse. Lord, please heal my dads pain. Please give us all the strength and guidance we need. Please can every Fisher on this planet have a good nights rest tonight, and wake up ready for another day. I ask this in Jesus name. Amen.

I honestly thought that Dad would hold out only until my brother arrived. But I was wrong. I'm not sure what the medication was doing to dad but I kept talking to him the whole time. His eyes stayed closed most of the time only opening every now and again. When my brother arrived he spoke to Dad for a bit and showed him the parts he had brought for my dads vintage car. Eventually my dad opened his eyes, saw my brother and exclaimed, 'My son! What a pleasure!' We all just cried and cried. Throughout the day, old friends and family that I'd never seen before popped. All had kind words, some of them even told us to stay positive cos he might pull through. I just smiled - they had no idea the journey we had been on.
Although my dad had been a regular churchgoer for a good few years, he refused to accept Communion, until this final hospital stay, where he took Communion at every opportunity. So when the priest came to give Last Rites, it really felt so final. All of us standing around in a circle, saying the Lords Prayer for my dad.
That night again we planned on staying over at the hospital, but we were told everything was still stable and we could go home and rest.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Tuesday, 12 September 2006

What a day. Dad was very calm about surgery. He understood what needed to be done.

Dr M said that there was nothing left to fix. Intestinal failure. As if he had cancer and it had eaten away his insides. Nothing more, medically can be done. They are treating his pain and keeping him comfortable. Before the morphine hit, he thanked me for always being by his side. We told him that we are so proud of him. He said thank you. It is so hard knowing that he is left to die, but his body is very weak from the op. Georgie rang from the plane, talking about 2nd opinions and not giving up. I pray that she can come to terms with this. Lord, please heal my dads pain, and fill his heart with love. Please Lord. I ask in Jesus name. Amen.

Subject: update
Date: Tue, 12 Sep 2006 08:52:26 +0200

doc and his partner are operating this afternoon on my dad to try and
fix this problem once and for all. It's back to square one surgery-wise, but we have to do what we have to do. thanks for all the prayers and positive thoughts


I left work to sit with Dad before the op. I didn't bring the newspaper as I had always done, and Dad wanted one, so I got him the paper. I sat whilst the nurse filled in all the surgery forms and Dad read the paper. He had a new nurse that I hadn't seen before. Looking back, II think that they assigned someone new intentionally, because they knew what the day had in store. The nurse told my Dad that it was rude to read while he had a visitor, and he joked that 'this one likes to talk too much.' He was so brave going in, he understood that this needed to be done.
After he went in, Mom and went and sat by the lifts, thinking that we might miss the Doctor leaving after surgery otherwise. After a few hours we decided that they surely should be done by now and went looking in ICU. As we walked in the sister in charge called us into the office, where Dr M was waiting for us. We asked him how it went and he looked us with slight grimace, which oddly seemed like a smile at the time and said, 'Not good at all.' After further questioning he explained that this was it. There is nothing more that they can do. He can only describe it as intestinal failure, like heart failure. He said that Dad was not doing well under anaestethic.
I stayed calm. I had to phone my sisters and my brother and explain to them what was happening. I was too scared to go see my dad, what do say to someone who is dying? The nurse urged me to go inside. The anaesthetist was busy setting up my dads medication. They already had him on morphine, and one of the side effects is itching. My dad had already almost scratched his nose raw since he came out of surgery.
It made me feel sick inside to see the beautiful pristine dressing over his abdomen. It felt so obscene, knowing that inside he was a complete mess. They just sew you up and leave you to die.
I held dads hand, and spoke to him while he was still conscious.
I spoke to the sister in charge after my sisters had arrived. She said that she thought Dad knew. He had said to her the day before that if anyone comes to visit him even if it wasn't family, that they were to let them in.
We were planning on staying over in the waiting room. Georgie rang from the plane, she was so upset and outraged. She insisted that we were giving up hope too easily and hadn't looked at all the options. That there had to be a way. They would speak to the specialist in the morning.
I couldn't argue back, I understood how helpless they were feeling. But I was there, and I knew what I saw. This was it.
Eventually the nurse came and told us to go home and sleep. She said that Dads heart rate was still very steady and it would be a while before things started to turn. We should rest and be back in the morning.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Monday, 11 September 2006

Mills is operating tomorrow at 1pm

My 13th Bodytalk
- T4, middle back
- grieving heart
- spleen

Dads 3rd Bodytalk
- chemical debris, brain
- balance cortices
- musclo-skeletal links, whole body
- cellular, DNA, reprogram, build healthy cells
- support regarding fear of time (awareness of) recurring as he needs it
[not sure, too little time left, or time spent in hospital?]

Lord, please stay with my dad and keep him strong. Please help him recover quickly and without complications. Please help the doctor to finally fix my dad properly. Lord, please strengthen our whole family, and guide us through this difficult time.
Please give my dad the strength he needs to heal. He wants to get better and come home and he can do that with your help. I ask this in Jesus name. Amen.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Sunday, 10 September 2006

Took dad the paper. Spoke to Dr M. He can only really tell once he is in surgery. But Dr R will be there, 2 heads are better than one. I am confident in Dr M and dad is strong. We are just being tested again, but our family is stronger than this. Lord, please prepare my dad mentally and physically for the week ahead. I know with your power anything is possible. Please give us all the strength we need to get through this week. Please keep us positive. Thank you for getting us this far. Thank you for your grace and mercy.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Saturday, 9 September 2006

Dad was sitting today when I arrived. Bought him a card on 'dads'. He had a good sleep tonight. This evening we waited for the visitors to leave and snuck the boys in for a quick hello. Dad got such a shock, I don't think there was time to take it all in. The boys are too gorgeous. Taylor says as we are leaving, 'I love oupa!' They are both such lovely children. I love them to bits.
Please please keep my dad in a good frame of mind. I know he is strong but please help strengthen him this week. Please help heal his body. Please give Mills & Raidoo strength and guidance to help my dad get better. Thank you Lord.

I left the card behind after my morning visit. Mom said that dad was quite moved by it. We always had a hard time openly showing our love, and I knew that this was the right time to try and communicate how I felt to my dad.
Mom and I were babysitting the boys. We spoke to the nurses and they agreed to let us bring the boys in to see dad. Hung around until visiting hours were over and then ran in with the boys, long enough to give him a hug. Dad was so surprised, but so happy to see them.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Friday, 8 September 2006

Georgie phoned. She is worried about signing a lease versus coming home. I can't say how things will play out, but I don't know if coming home is the answer. This is hard for all of us. I just pray that my dad will be allowed to heal.
Went to see Confetti after work with Jo. What a lovely movie. I like the mockumentry style. It reminds me so much of real life.
Dad was up till 4am this morning so they let him sleep today. He was more himself tonight. Less budgie sightings. Brad phoned and spoke to him. Lily is walking. I'm so proud of her.
Thank you for strengthening us each day. Thank you for listening to our prayers. Lord, please help heal my dad. Please guide Dr M to help the healing process in the best possible way.

Subject: update
Date: Fri, 8 Sep 2006 08:12:03 +0200

Doc operated again on dad last friday (can't say exactly what he did,

he told my mom and she doesn't have a clue) but it was just something
minor to try help the 'intestinal fistula' (that is what they are
calling it now) to close up. It doesn't seem to have helped much.

Dads electrolytes are still out, they were giving him magnesium the

other day. He is very confused and now is seeing things too. Last
night I watched him watch a budgie (?) fly around the room.
Apparently he has been seeing a lot of bird life in the ICU. It's
funny, but it's sad and scary too.

Mom spoke to Doc yesterday, he described dads condition as 'so-so'.

The fistula has not healed on its own as he hoped and he can't rule
out that there is any further obstruction. He has said that next week
he will operate with his partner and open up completely again and
start from scratch to fix what they can. If they can. Otherwise they
will have to sew up and try and create a colostomy - but I've never
heard of a colostomy in the small intestine, so that must be the 'we
have done all we can' solution as I don't know what quality of life
that will allow for. I guess its more 'wait and see' and stay positive.

Otherwise, how are you all doing :-) ?



Sunday, September 7, 2008

Thursday, 7 September 2006

Had my interview at Mr Price today. Went well. Lori reminded me of Elisa Ferreira. I think we clicked well. They hadn't even looked at my CV and they seemed quite keen on me. Went well, except for me arriving at work with a huge Mr Price visitor sticker on my boob.
I am scared for my dad. Dr M described his condition as so-so, he had hoped the fistula would have healed itself. Next week both him and Dr R will op and start from scratch and see if there is anything they can do. This seems like the last thing they can and will do. I am scared. What if dad doesn't make it? What if they can't do anything. This feels like the end of the line. And it doesn't help that when I visit dad, he is having delusions. Seeing budgies flying.

I am scared. Lord, please give us all the strength to continue. Please help all of us, especially my dad and the doctors. Can you please heal my dad? Please heal his pain and suffering. Lord please send down the light of the Holy Spirit to fill my dad with love and healing. Please send angels to guide and watch over him and help focus on the healing that needs to take place. Please Lord.

Thank you for having mercy on us.

I snuck out for a job interview during the time I would have gone to visit dad. He said it was okay… That night he was telling us about all the budgies that were in the room. He was whispering as to not frighten them. I remember him pointing and whispering gently, 'there's a baby one…' We laughed. But it was scary.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Wednesday, 6 September 2006

Dad thinks he went home today. He said that the bed/blankets are hiding all his things. Earlier he lost a burger! Very confused and irritable, he fights with us because of the confusion. They are giving him more magnesium. Lord, please help my dads abdomen to heal so that he may start eating and get strong so that he can come home. Please Lord. Send down your angels with healing powers. Please help us. Please.

All Dads imagined stories were so amusing, because he was so sincere about all it. He honestly believed all these thing in his mind. And he would get so cross with us when we didn't take him seriously.

Friday, September 5, 2008

Tuesday, 5 September 2006

Dad had a dizzy spell (seizure) today during his physio. He doesn't seem to be remembering very much. He sounded like his speech was affected too. Almost like a slur. He saw ants at the end of the bed ad we couldn't convince him otherwise. I pray that these problems will get sorted out so that my dad can go into the surgical ward, start eating and get strong. Then he can come home. Please Lord, keep my dad strong and help heal him from the inside out. Send down the healing light of the Holy Spirit to fill his body with healing energy. Please have mercy on us Lord. Please help.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Monday, 4 September 2006

Good day at work, got a bit done. Things don't seem as bad as I would have thought. Dads doing okay. Damn bag keeps leaking though. Took dad some Lemos. Got a phone call for the Mr Price interview. Not sure how I feel. Will wait and see. Lord, please help my dad heal faster so that he can start eating and get strong and come home. Please help heal Esters infection. I ask this in Jesus name. Amen.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Sunday, 3 September 2006

Met the girls for lunch at Pizzetta. Had a lovely chat and great food. What a nice day.
Visited dad today. The lump in his neck was a salivary gland, doctor prescribed lemons to help clear it. Dads looking good. I pray that he can start eating soon and won't be in ICU for much longer. Lord please help my dads body heal so that he can came home. I ask this in Jesus name. Amen.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Saturday, 2 September 2006

Plant Faire at Bot Gardens today. Visited dad this morning, slight leak from bag.
Tonight dad was looking good. He said that he is feeling so much better then last week, but has a huge lymph node on his neck (RHS). Otherwise he's fab. I pray that the op was a success and that dad will be home soon.

Met up with Claire, Tracy and Kevin for dinner. They have been dating for a year and have been thinking about marriage. Good for her. Nice evening, got a bit drunk, but anyway. Lovely to catch up again.

Lord, please help heal my dad. Your powers are truly amazing. Please have mercy on us. I ask this in Jesus name. Amen

Monday, September 1, 2008

Friday, 1 September 2006

Much better day today! Mom texted to say that dad was going into theatre in 30 minutes, but as I started driving she rang to say they were already taking him into theatre. But he came through fine. Now I just pray that the op is successful. Dad is looking better today then he has in a while. Looking strong. Nurse said that the wound started gushing and they have put a stoma on as well. I hope to find out what Dr M has done. Mom spoke to him but she still doesn't understand. Very frustrating. Thank you Lord for always listening. Please send the healing light of the Holy Spirit to bathe my dad with joy and love.

Subject: update
Date: Fri, 1 Sep 2006 10:48:21 +0200

dad has just gone into theatre, the opening in his abdomen has gotten

a lot smaller and the doctor wants to suture it up.

please send positive thoughts all you fabulous people



Sunday, August 31, 2008

Thursday, 31 August 2006

What a day! Had so much to do in one day. Got a lot of help from the girls in the studio. There was a bit of a beer debacle. But it all went off smoothly and there was so much food left. What a joke! Did a lot of cleaning.
Visited dad, was nice to see him. They are giving him magnesium at the moment. Dr M wants to operate tomorrow to close the wound. I pray that the op is a success and that dad has the strength to pull through. He has done so well up to now. Lord, please guide and strengthen Dr M to do his best work on my dad. Please look after my dad and bring him safely through surgery again. Thank you for getting me through today it was really difficult, but now its over.

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Wednesday, 30 August 2006

Visited dad today. He seems a lot better. He had the on and we chatted a bit. Ran around a bit today. The studio went out for lunch for Kerins farewell. Ate too much, drank too much and just felt ill afterward. Not nice at all. And then I get briefed on a heck of a lot of work for tomorrow.
Not quite sure how tomorrow is gonna pan out. I've gotten so used to the rug being pulled out from me, that when things go smoothly I am so afraid of it all going bad before my eyes. I am really scared that something bad is gonna happen. As if I don't deserve any pleasures in life. I can only pray that the Lord gives me strength and courage to face each day. I am so grateful for every day and all the small things we usually take for granted. I am so grateful. I know how quickly it can be taken away.
Lord please help my dad heal. He has already made such huge progress with your help. Please help relax that crick in his body. He seems to be bending over like a banana.

Thank you for the strength you give us each day, I would not be able to go on without it. Thank you Lord. I just want to cry with relief, yet I have no relief at the moment. I pray that tomorrow can go smoothly. I pray that dad can soon enter the wards. I ask this in Jesus name. Amen.

Subject: Re: low potassium
Date: Wed, 30 Aug 2006 07:32:49 +0200

To: b

Dads levels were still low last night, and his heartbeat a bit
erratic. He is still confused but slightly less so. I was able to have a conversation with him and he has stopped fighting with the nurse. But he didn't remember me visiting earlier in the day. He read his man u magazine as we were leaving.

Jocelyn will be coming to change his dressing today.


Friday, August 29, 2008

Tuesday, 29 August 2006

Dad not so aggressive anymore, but I can tell he is still confused. His potassium levels are not correct yet. I hope it normalises soon. Got him reading his Man U magazine. Heart rate is still going bananas. I pray that he gets a good nights sleep so that his blood pressure can come down. But he is sounding better. He didn't remember that I visited him earlier.
Lord, please help my dad heal. Please give him strength so that we can improve each day. Please help his electrolytes balance out so that we can focus on healing his abdomen. Thank you for always listening to our prayers.
Thank you Lord.

Subject: Re: low potassium

Date: Tue, 29 Aug 2006 07:33:59 +0200

I don't about surgery at this stage, he hasn't said anything. I'm not
sure how long it'll take for his system to come right, cos he really was not himself last night. He was argumentative and confused, wouldn't let the nurse near him to take his temperature. Really irritable, but not his normal irritable. Hopefully he is feeling better today.

On 29 Aug 2006, at 1:52 PM, b wrote:

Ja, just called the hospital nurse says that dad is very confused at
times,and that Dr M is very concerned of his condition,hopefully they get the right formula soon, has your body talk lady been able to help at all, try all keep focused and positive.

Subject: Re: low potassium

Date: Tue, 29 Aug 2006 14:03:50 +0200

To: b

He was less argumentitive this morning, but still confused. And very
nauseous. He keeps retching, but doesn't vomit. The tremors aren't as bad as they were, and he says he can feel his strength coming back.

She did a distance session sunday night, and then I let her know
about the potassium. She said that made sense and that she would do another distance session last night. Will text her again tonight.


Thursday, August 28, 2008

Monday, 28 August 2006

Well, Dr M did some blood tests and it seems dads electrolytes are out of balance, potassium really low. Checked side effects; confusion, seizures, heart arrhythmia, muscle weakness. Morag said she picked along those lines during the distance session last night and will work again tonight.
Dad was not himself tonight. He fought with us and wouldn't allow the nurse to take his temperature. I don't know how long it'll take for him to normalise. He had a cup of tea today. Oh but, he was nasty and cheeky to us. But it's because he is sick. I just pray that he improves soon.
Lord, please help my dad and the sister looking after him tonight. I hope that there isn't further fighting. Lord, please help my dads intestines to heal fully so that he may start eating soon. Please give us all strength to go on. Please help us. Thank you for listening and caring. Amen.

Subject: update
Date: Mon, 28 Aug 2006 12:08:23 +0200

lets see dad has been taking a few steps with the physiotherapist,
he has a walking frame to help support himself. He walked to the scales in the next ward and weighed himself, he has lost 25kg.
The leak is still there, but the wound is getting smaller, doctor is
pleased. He also had a couple bowel movements last week. Gross, I know, but it's a good sign that things are moving down there.
He was having tremors this weekend and last night the nurses thought
he had a seizure, but doctor checked his electrolytes and his potassium was low, so it isn't as serious as we thought.
At the moment we are still waiting patiently for things to get
better, hopefully they won't need to operate again.



Subject: low potassium
Date: Mon, 28 Aug 2006 15:20:51 +0200

Geez, dad had all the symptoms below, good thing they are treating
it. He needs to get better so that he can start eating a balanced diet.


Hypokalemia is a potentially fatal condition in which the body fails
to retain sufficient potassium to maintain health. The condition is
also known as potassium deficiency. The prefix hypo- means low
(contrast with hyper-, meaning high). The middle kal refers to
kalium, which is Latin for potassium. The end portion of the word, -
emia, means 'in the blood' (note, however, that hypokalemia is
usually indicative of a systemic potassium deficit).

Signs and symptoms
There may be no symptoms at all, but severe hypokalemia may cause:
Muscle weakness and myalgia
Increased risk of hyponatremia with resultant confusion and seizures
Disturbed heart rhythm (ranging from ectopy to arrhythmias)
Serious arrhythmias
EKG changes associated with hypokalemia[1]:
Flattened (notched) T waves
U waves
ST depression
Prolonged QT interval

Wow. 'Not as serious as we thought'. Messed up electrolytes can kill you. I have never seen such an immediate and dramatic change in my father than when his potassium levels were low. Frightening.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Sunday, 27 August 2006

Dad hadn't slept well last night. He tossed and turned. Hasn't been too chatty lately either. He had a seizure tonight during his bed bath. They may do a brain scan tomorrow. His heart rate was also very erratic. Still trembling and shaking.
It's scary because I don't know what it means in the bigger picture. Things had been going well. I texted Morag and she said that she would do a distance session tonight.

Lord, please send down your angels to watch over my dad tonight. Please keep him safe and give him sweet dreams.

Please heal his brain and guide Dr M to give him the best care possible. Please Lord, have mercy on us. Send down the healing light of the Holy Spirit to bathe my dad in love and joy. Amen.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Saturday, 26 August 2006

Dad wasn't himself today. Didn't have a good sleep last night. Dr M is happy with the wounds progress.
Tonight he was so wide eyed it was startling. But he had his sleeping tablet at 6pm and was trying to stay awake for us. We chatted for a bit, but he wasn't himself. He asked us to leave early so he could sleep. Shame, he couldn't keep his eyes open.
Leaving Hyper by the Sea today I saw the ex driving with some woman and her kid. What more can I say? I am so over him.

I love Taylor and Nathan so much. Nathan is getting so big. He likes to throw. Drew 'tattoos' all over himself with kokis today.

Lord please help my mom too. Please help her find what she is looking for. Lord, please help my dad heal over the next few days so that his wound may dry up and close, and he may start eating again and get strange so he may come home. Please Lord, let this happen with you help.
I ask this in Jesus name. Amen.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Friday, 25 August 2006

Dads 2nd BodyTalk
- scar tissue RHS - circulation nerve endings etc

- release matrix - regarding 2nd op with Dr M

- fear (not of dying) but of living a long life…

My 12th BodyTalk

- fear regarding separation regarding dad

- cold spots in brain (stress related)

- deep balance regarding perception of situation

Tonight dad seemed a bit down, but was also drowsy from the sleeping tablets. Looks like mom wants him to see a psychiatrist. :-(
He had a solid stool today and they removed his catheter… He is a bit scared of drinking too much now though. Buts its good cos the fluid leaking seems to have slowed down.

Thank you Lord for helping to heal my dad. Please continue strengthening and guiding all of us. Please can the wounds heal so that my dad can come home. I ask this in Jesus name. Amen.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Thursday, 24 August 2006

Missed the visit this morning. Did have a slight headache! Dad had three bowel movements today! The first was like old blood, and the second lot were watery stools! I think that is great news. It shows that the bowel is working again. I pray that things will start flowing smoothly. The leak will dry up and all will be good.
Please Lord, keep sending your healing energy to help my dad. Please strengthen us all to keep up the stamina for the journey. Dad weighed himself yesterday. Lost 25kgs!

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Wednesday, 23 August 2006

Got a mail from Brad today, from Dr M, to say dad is not better/not worse but his tummy is working so will wait and see. Glad to know he is not in a hurry to operate again. Dad missed physio today as the had to change his bag/dressing. Didn't visit tonight, went to the Wine Week with Jo and Kerin. Had fun, tasted some some good wines and had a good whinge. I'm all cheese and whined out.
Lord, please help my dad to continue to heal so that he may come home and continue to strengthen & heal so that he may come home and continue with his life. Please help give us all the strength to go from day to day and do what needs to be done. Thank you.

Friday, August 22, 2008

Tuesday, 22 August 2006

Dads 1st Bodytalk
- small intestine, lots of first aid/repair work. Relating to an incident around 13-16 years old, with his dad
- doesn't like the hospital. environment affecting lungs
- 2 month program focus on healing the abdomen

Next session 3 days, Morag. I was pleased that the session went well and was beneficial. I hope that we can continue to help the healing process.
Dads bag got a leak and the wound ladies can't come tonight. I hope he is able to get a good nights rest. Lord, please help my dads body, give it the strength it needs to heal rapidly, so that my dad can regain his strength and come home. Please can he start pooping and pooing again. Please Lord, help him heal. Lord, please also heal and care for the little girl in the ICU. Give her parents strength to keep giving her the support she needs. I ask this in Jesus name. Amen.

Date: Tue, 22 Aug 2006 12:52:15 +0200

Bodytalk went well. You never know whether the body is willing to

heal or not but dads body responded well. The first bundle she worked
on was based in the small intestine. She said she did lots of little
bits of first aid. She related it to an incident with his dad when he
was between 13-16 years old.
The next bundle was related to the hospital enviroment. She could

tell that he REALLY does not like being in hospital! This was coming
up in his lungs. Even dad had said that he has never had phlegm like
this before.
The last thing was a 2 month 'program' set in the body to keep the

focus and healing on the intestinal area.
She asked his body if this session had been beneficial and it said yes.

It also requested another bodytalk in 3 days time.

So it is sounding good, we just need to give dads body time to heal.



Thursday, August 21, 2008

Monday, 21 August 2006

Today after I left they installed a TV for dad! He was so chuffed, after all the moans and groans about not wanting a TV, he is quite pleased. Dad drinking away his liquifruit. I do hope he isn't drinking too much! The little girl isn't doing very well. I do pray that she improves. Lord, tomorrow I will be doing body talk on my dad. Please be with us both and help the healing energy flow. Let the energy of the Holy Spirit flow through us both. I ask this in Jesus name.
Please have mercy on us Lord. We are not worthy to receive you, but say the word, and we shall be healed. Thank you for giving me strength each day. Amen.

Date: Mon, 21 Aug 2006 09:07:59 +0200

Dad was doing great on Friday. He chatted with the counsellor and has
accepted that he will be in hospital for a long time. So he is =20
focusing on the positive. He understands how far he has come and that it will take long for him to regain his full strength. He asked Dr M on saturday how much longer he will be in ICU, and he said ten more days. Not sure if that's true or not - we haven't spoken to him yet. I was under the impression that there is going to have to be another major op.
Well, I'm doing the Bodytalk tomorrow for dad, and I pray
that it will help speed along the recovery.



There was a little girl in ICU too for a very long time. You start to follow any progress and get to know the family, without every really knowing them.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Sunday, 20 August 2006

Took dad his soft tissues today. He said Ria gave him the most delicious juice last night. He asked me about the ex & I. In his own words, he was spoilt. He said that he could see that J wasn't interested in doing things as a couple. He never once nagged me though… Was nice to talk to dad about it though. Helps me accept things. Dads still coughing up phlegm but his throat is a lot better.
Lord, please heal my dads intestines so that he can start eating again, get strong and carry on with his life. Please Lord, he has learnt his lesson. I ask this in Jesus name. Amen.

The nurse gave him Cranberry Cooler…

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Saturday, 19 August 2006

Took dad some sprite this morning, Dr M said he could have a sip every now and again. Dr M also said he is looking at about 10 more days in ICU. Not sure what that means. Jocelyn also said that the hole has gotten slightly smaller, compared to before the last op. Dr M also gave dad a tranquiliser. All in all, a good day. I keep hope and pray that my dad will heal 100% so he can come home and carry on with his new lease on life. Thank you for giving us all the strength to go on each day.

Dad was supposed to sip the Sprite Zero - he drank 2 buddies in a day! Cheeky!

Monday, August 18, 2008

Friday, 18 August 2006

Today was a good day. Work was a bit mental this morning, felt under the druk. Popped in quickly to see dad, brad phoned and chatted. Dads throat is feeling better, still has a bit of a cough though. Tonight was a lovely visit. I think with all the counselling dad has begun to accept being in hospital. He is so looking forward to being home though. He will be so grateful to come home. That is good. I'm glad he isn't dwelling on the negative and the things beyond his control. I am thankful for that. Lord, thank you for giving us all strength and keeping us positive. Please continue helping to heal my dad. He wants so much to get better. Please send the healing light of the Holy Spirit to fill him with love and light and healing. Thank you so much Lord. Please keep the angels looking over my dad and protecting him. I ask this in Jesus name. Amen.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Thursday, 17 August 2006

Dad took a few steps again today. Jocelyn come to change his dressing. Was a good visit tonight. Told dad about PTA hiring Nadja, Mr Price calling about a job. Brought him some lozenges for his throat. He had a bit of a moment, we were talking about how lucky is. He said he was thinking about what I said about how sick he was. We gave him a hug. I told him that we were so proud that he kept fighting and that he is a very special person.
We love him and want him to come home. It was a special moment. I also booked with Linda to do Body Talk on dad on tuesday. I look forward to be able to help the healing in any way I can. Thank you for each new day. Thank you for my dad.

Lord, please continue to strengthen and heal my dad. Please help him to continue improving so that he may come home again. I ask this in Jesus name. Amen.

Subject: update
Date: Thu, 17 Aug 2006 12:11:08 +0200

Mom got had the book last night. His throat is still sore, making him

very uncomfortable and grumpy. Dr M never came yesterday, and dad is
still waiting for him to come today to give him something for his
throat. He has a spray and some lozenges but they haven't really
helped. Took a few steps again today with the physio. Jocelyn should
be coming later to change dads dressing.

I have booked a BodyTalk on monday morning, to treat dad through me.

I hope we can help improve things in any way possible.

keep well


Saturday, August 16, 2008

Wednesday, 16 August 2006

Dads throat was sore today. Dr M hadn't come by time we left at 8. Mom got Dad the Lance Armstrong book. He was grumpy cos his throat was killing him. The nurse tonight remembered dad from when he was on the other side. I really hope and pray that by some miracle, whatever is blocking my dads gi tract will disappear overnight. Just like that. Then the wound will dry up and it'll be just looking forward. This is not a nice time. For any of us. I just want my dad to come home and live a long life, and a happy one too.
Lord please strengthen and heal my dad. Fill him with the healing light of the Holy Spirit. Please.

Friday, August 15, 2008

Tuesday, 15 August 2006

Another day. Dad took a few steps today. He was very sleepy when we visited. Very down again this evening, feeling sorry for himself. Lying in bed all day… he says his mind wanders. They got the TV going but he is still not happy. I really hope his attitude becomes more positive, it will really make the days easier. Mills said they will have to do another serious op in 2 weeks and then its back to square one. I can't even think about that right now. I can't.
Lord please help my dad, he is feeling very down at the moment. Please help him to see past the rain clouds. Lord, please help my dads intestines, so that Dr Mills doesn't have a big job to sort out. Please give my dad the strength he needs to get through each day. Please send down the healing light of the Holy Spirit to heal my dads pain. Please send a miracle Lord, please send a miracle. Please grace us with your mercy.


Date: Wed, 16 Aug 2006 12:33:41 +0200

Chatted with dad today, he sounded a bit less negative. I kept
pointing out the things that he should be grateful for. He seems a bit better. His throat is really sore though, he is waiting for Dr M so he can sort it out.

Ja, from what Dr M said yesterday its gonna be a long journey. Wait
about 2 weeks for dad to regain his strength and then another big op like the first one, and then we will be back to square one. So frustrating, but we have to do what we have to do.

Sometimes I wonder if Dr M is the right person for the job, but how is one to know?

I will look out for that book for dad.


Thursday, August 14, 2008

Monday, 14 August 2006

Nathans Birthday

Took Dad The Mercury today. Dr M not yet back. Dr R prescribed dad an enema and he passed 3 stools. It never occurred to me that there may be faeces causing an obstruction, but it makes sense. I can only pray that my dads gi tract will work itself clear. That in itself would be a miracle. I will feel such joy. Uncle Trevor visited.
Dad was feeling very down today. He was so upset, as he says 'how much more can a body take?' It is so hard for him now. If I only knew what I could do to cheer him up. Lord, please help heal my dads abdomen, clear any obstruction, heal any tears and please keep my dad positive. Please help him have a good nights sleep and sweet dreams so that he can be prepared for another day. Please give him the strength he needs to get better and come home. Please Lord. Thank you for always listening to our prayers and caring about our problems. Amen.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Sunday, 13 August 2006

This morning Dr R lanced an abscess on my dads side. A lot of muck came out he said. Dad also sat this afternoon for about an hour, in the nice lazyboy. Dad had a rough day today, its really hard for him to be in bed all day. He really, really wants to come home. He is not going to be happy about more surgery. Lord, please strengthen and guide my dad during this difficult time, please help him stay positive and focus on healing and getting better. Please help heal my dads intestines, please help ease any obstruction so that he may be able to finally use the bedpan! Lord, please send down a miracle so that my dad can come home. I ask this in Jesus name. Please send down the healing light of the Holy Spirit. Thank you Lord.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Saturday, 12 August 2006

Okay. So its leaking again. But now we have realised that there must be a blockage somewhere.
Which means more surgery…

We cut dads hair today. I think I prefer it longer!

Lord, please help us here. Please send a miracle, we have been praying for so long but not for the right thing. Lord, your power is so great, please heal my dad. I would just love for him to go to the toilet again. I pray that my dad will grow in strength so that his abdomen can heal fully and he is able to return home. Lord, please can the obstruction clear without complication. Please, I ask in Jesus name. Every time I think we cannot take any more, we get past it. We will get past this and come out a stronger family for it. Thank you for helping us see our strength.

We love you dad. We all pray each day so that you may heal. Thank you Lord for your kindness. Please have mercy on us Lord.

Oh my word. The way mom and I got kakked on during the haircut. We had no idea what we were doing and he knew it. He was certain that we would leave big bald spots. He took pride in his appearance.

Monday, August 11, 2008

Friday, 11 August 2006

Today was the best day so far and I am almost to scared to say it in case it get taken away. Dad was so happy to see us this morning, he asked us for a hug & a kiss. Dr M was happy this morning too, though mom seemed concerned about there being drainage. Dad was so positive and grateful for today. He was so happy to be alive.
I really hope and pray that things continue to get better each and every day. I love my dad and want him to come home. Please can the sutures hold so that his leaks all heal up well, so that his wound may close up. Please can my dad get better so that he may come home.

Thank you Lord for giving us all the strength to get this far. Thank you for your grace and kindness. Thank you for your healing power. Thank you for today.
Cheri is right, it is only with prayer that we can find our way. I have so much to pray for once my dad gets better. Prayer is powerful.

Subject: update

Date: Fri, 11 Aug 2006 12:30:11 +0200

surgery went well, doctor managed to find the leak and stitch up. we
just have to hope that it holds until it heals. dad recovered well from the anaesthetic. this morning he was SO happy to see us. he is so glad to have made it through the surgery. they were not able to close the wound yet, but if the intestine heals then it will dry out and close on its own. please keep sending positive thoughts that this last little bit will finally heal.



Sunday, August 10, 2008

Thursday, 10 August 2006

What a day. This morning mom mailed to say that Dr M will operate this afternoon. I was in such a state. My creative director let me leave and spend the day with dad. Time flew by. We chatted, he was in a lot of pain from his bladder. Brought in Taylor & Nathan to see him. He was so happy to see them, but he did get a bit upset though. Time flew by and before I knew it, we were leaving dad in theatre, not knowing how things would turn out. We all just had to remain positive.
Then next thing we knew, Corinna, Michael's wife came rushing in, hysterical, 'I don't know what to do, they phoned me, I can't go in there, what if he's dead!' Mom held her for a while and then eventually offered to take her in. The doctor was there, and we heard her cry immediately. Winnie and I both started sobbing, it was awful.

And as the family came in, we sobbed with them. The feeling, I cannot explain and to see the grief in other people. I can't describe the effect it had on me, knowing that dad was in theatre at the same time, thinking that could be us! Just hearing the grief was enough to set me off crying but at the same time I felt as though I needed that cry, it was really exactly what I needed. As awful at it was, his parents were lovely, such kind friendly people who kept us company for over a week. I would never have believed that things would have turned out this way. Never.

'You cry for those who are left behind'.

Lord, please carry Michael safely into your arms where he may rest and breathe easy. Please guide and strengthen his family during this difficult time of loss.

Thank you for giving my dad the strength to make it through this op. Thank you for giving Dr M the skill to have operated so successfully. Please keep sending down the healing light of the Holy Spirit to care for and strengthen my dad. Thank you for the strength you have given us.

Thank you.

Morning V

Spoke to Dr M when I got to the office.

It is the small intestine that is the problem and not healing. He wants to operate some time today most probably this afternoon as his brother/brother in law was killed in a car accident this week and he is going up for the funeral in Pretoria and doesn't want to leave the operating for to long. He will have to see how he can fix it whilst he is under.

Love ma

Michael had been admitted earlier in the week with severe pneumonia. He had started with the 'flu 2 weeks earlier and not gotten better. As only 2 visitors are allowed in ICU at a time, and there are 3 visting hours a day, we got to know his family over those few days. His parents were lovely people, who promised to pray for dad. When dad went into surgery, we faced with the thought of not seeing him alive again. Little did we know at the moment the doctors were desparately trying to resuscitate Michael. We sat and sobbed as family and friends poured in. All the while knowing that Dad is in surgery. It was cathartic for us, but hard to comprehend. THAT COULD BE US.

Saturday, August 9, 2008

Wednesday, 9 August 2006

Womens Day
Slept in, the best weather ever. Pouring with rain.
Changed dads catheter today. He is complaining of pain. Bladder infection? Dad told mom that he doesn't think he will make another op. I don't know whether to believe him or not. This can't be it. We are stronger than all of this.
Lord please help all of us stay positive. Please help my dads colon to heal nicely and quickly.
Please Lord.
Today dad told us how he snorted a snolly onto the curtain, and had to ask the nurse to wipe it up! He also said he had a dizzy spell this morning when he had his bed bath.
I really think Dr M needs to act quickly. We need to fix my dads tummy before there are serious infection. Lord, please send down the healing of the Holy Spirit to strengthen my dad. So that he may have the strength to fight this last leg of his illness. Please Lord, let my dad stay strong. Please also guide Dr M that he may care and look after my dad properly. That Dr M may do what is best for my dads healing. Please Lord. I ask for your mercy. Amen.

Friday, August 8, 2008

Tuesday, 8 August 2006

Visited dad this morning. Dr M had been, but dad was sleeping so he was gonna come back later. Chatted to Dad about a lot of things.
Spoke to Dr R, he was a bit reassuring in his explanation of the surgery. Dad isn't keen though, I could see. He wanted to speak to Brad. I texted him, but I think it was before his lunch break. Had a good visit though. I'm positive about things. I continue to pray for strength and healing. I pray for guidance for Dr M. I pray that my dad can make a full recovery. Please Lord.

Thank you for caring and listening.

Date: Tue, 8 Aug 2006 12:45:27 +0200

Hey there,

Yesterday during dads visit he said that Dr M mentioned that he may

have to operate again.

I was not keen on the idea at all, mom was supposed to speak to Dr M

today, but i haven't heard anything back from her. Today when I
visited dad, i saw Dr R and went to speak to him. I told him
everything I knew up till now and asked what he thought about
surgery. He said the tissues were initially very delicate because of
the infection and malnutrition, but now that there is no infection
and dad has been getting his TPN, the tissue should be a lot
healthier, and if the fluid output is higher, it would be better to
operate now to close everything up while it is still infection free.

I don't if dad will end up with a colostomy, but if that's what it

takes to make him better then fine.
So will wait to hear what Dr M says, dad is not keen on another op


Thursday, August 7, 2008

Monday, 7 August 2006

The Wound Care specialist said that there is no progress and that it is too expensive to keep the vacuum on the wound with so much fluid coming out. Doctor mentioned to dad that he wants to operate again.
Lord, I'm not too keen on more operations. Please help heal his colon, please can the tear rectify itself so that there is no need to operate. Please Lord, your power is great and can make anything possible. Please send the Holy Spirit down to touch my dad and heal him from the inside. Please take away his pain so that he can come home and start his new life. Please Lord, strengthen my dad so that there are no more infections and that his colon can heal itself.
Doctor seems so impatient, but I know that you are already sending love and light to my dads abdomen.

I beg for your mercy with what little strength I have left. Please Lord, have mercy on us. Your grace and power are glorious and we are blessed by your caring love. Please Lord, please send a miracle. Please send down a special angel with a miracle for my dad.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Sunday, 6 August 2006

J visited again today. It's official we can start telling people about the breakup.
Dad was looking a lot better this afternoon. I am a bit concerned that the fluids coming out has almost doubled since doctor did the stitches (!). It makes my heart sore, cos it feels like a step back. But we can only be patient. I'd rather the doctor didn't go in there again. I will prefer to work with prayer. His temp went up really high last night again. Lord, please can there be no more infection, please can my dads colon heal.

Dad got a bit sad today, talking about Nathans birthday. It was nice tonight as dad got some extra visitors, Carl and Robbie and Lorraine.

They are changing his central line and dressing tomorrow.

Thank you Lord for listening to our prayers, please also help the other families in ICU.

Please send down the healing light of the holy spirit to bathe over my dads body and heal him from within.

Thank you Lord.

Thank you for the strength I get every day to keep going. Thank you.

Dad had a huge soft spot for his grandson Nathan. It was wonderful to see how close they were and how he was able to be so affectionate with him, in a way he don't remember him being with us.
He had a tear in eye when he spoke of Nathan's upcoming birthday. He was so sad that he wouldn't be able to attend. He said with a shaky voice that this might be the last birthday he sees. We brushed it off and told him not to think like that. But he was right.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Saturday, 5 August 2006

This morning they changed dad's dressing. The lady said that the tear is even bigger now and even more faecal matter is coming out. Dad was also running a temp tonight, hot all over and he said he was aching all over. Also struggling a bit with coughing up phlegm.
Lord, please can the tear in my dads colon heal itself rapidly.

Please can there be no more infection or complications.

I am asking for a miracle, I am asking for your special archangels to come down and bring the healing light of the Holy Spirit to bathe over my dad tonight and heal him form the inside out.
To take away the pain in his heart.

Angelina, I know you are still there. Please help the nurses take good care of my dad, so that he can heal in comfort.

Thank you for giving us the strength we need to get through each day.

Please have mercy on my dad. Please help his pain so he may come home to us.

A healing bubble of light is surrounding my dad.

Saturday, 5 August 2006

This morning they changed dad's dressing. The lady said that the tear is even bigger now and even more faecal matter is coming out. Dad was also running a temp tonight, hot all over and he said he was aching all over. Also struggling a bit with coughing up phlegm.
Lord, please can the tear in my dads colon heal itself rapidly.

Please can there be no more infection or complications.

I am asking for a miracle, I am asking for your special archangels to come down and bring the healing light of the Holy Spirit to bathe over my dad tonight and heal him form the inside out.
To take away the pain in his heart.

Angelina, I know you are still there. Please help the nurses take good care of my dad, so that he can heal in comfort.

Thank you for giving us the strength we need to get through each day.

Please have mercy on my dad. Please help his pain so he may come home to us.

A healing bubble of light is surrounding my dad.

Monday, August 4, 2008

Friday, 4 August 2006

Visited dad this morning. He had sat for a few minutes, and I think he said he stood up too. Was quite sleepy when I came round. As I left, he said 'love you'.
This evening was nice. I think he was expecting his fishing friends to come tonight and so he had himself all laid out, covered neatly with a sheet, but they never came.
Tomorrow they change the wound dressing, and of course mom has to be there. She really seems to be enjoying all the blood and guts. Strange.

Thank you for giving us strength each day. Please continue strengthening and healing my dad.

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Thursday, 3 August 2006

Mills came in today and sutured dads colon as the catheters were not draining sufficiently. I do hope that the wound will now be able to heal faster. Dad was very awake this evening.
The nurse today gave dads hair a wash and a shave. No physio today. I will continue praying and sending positive energy to focus on dads healing. It's one last hurdle but this one is really gonna draw out and test us, but we are patient.
I must just say a prayer for the babies in ICU, 3 in one day? Shame, and they cry a lot. Thank you for another good day, and a great sleep. Last night I woke up and felt so awake and refreshed. Thank you!

Date: Thu, 3 Aug 2006 11:57:22 +0200

Hey there,

Just spoke to B at the hospital. This morning they came to change

the dressing, Mills decided to stitch up the holes as the catheters
were not coping with the drainage. Dad says he is very good with a
needle, but it was painful - they gave him pain med twice. He said
Mills had a good look around in there too. So now they have put the
dressing back on and the stuff draining off is more like pale pink,
so I hope the tears are sorted.
Otherwise all is well, Dad had his

first boiled sweets yesterday, he said they have really helped clear out his mouth of all that stuff from the thrush.



Saturday, August 2, 2008

Wednesday, 2 August 2006

Phoned in, dad was sleeping didn't go in today. His nurse said that he was moaning that now that B is gone back, no one is visiting him anymore. But then later he said that he always thought we were on mom's side, but now he sees that we care about him.
He is very awake and himself. He is keen to go to a general ward. He said that he is not sure if he wants to keep the birds, he may not manage when he comes home. It is really time now. He had his first sweet today. Really helped with his thrush.

Thank you for getting us this far. Please continue strengthening and helping my father heal.
Thank you for your grace.

Friday, August 1, 2008

Tuesday, 1 August 2006

Moira offered me a piece of paradise. My brother got let into the UK. Dad sat twice. I dreamt of owning my own time.
What a day. I really don't want to work with Nadja, I really don't.

I'm glad they got dad moving today, but they really need to be gentle with his wound. Its trying to heal.
Thank you for helping progress to move along, thank you for giving strength and healing to my dad. Thank you so much.

Angelina, your guidance has been special and is making all the difference. Please keep helping us along.

To: B & G

Subject: update

Date: Tue, 1 Aug 2006 12:42:59 +0200

doctor said yesterday that he is keen to get dad sitting. the

other doctor (mr hope for the best) popped in last night and he
agreed that they need to try get dad sitting. At least if they can
get him in a wheel chair, then he can get some fresh air. Dad agreed though that 'mr hope for the best' is weird.

I had brought earbuds yesterday, and last night we managed to get a

LOT of putty from his ears. Gross. He said that if they want to put
him in a chair mom needs to bring him underpants!

They sat him on the edge of the bed this morning for a while, so when
I arrived for a visit today he was fast asleep.



Subject: update

Date: Tue, 1 Aug 2006 12:43:18 +0200

on the weekend the doctor managed to identify 2 tears in his colon

(from the outside, yes, the wound is open) he has inserted tiny
catheters into each to help keep the area clean and dry and to help
it heal. Doctor is positive my dad is improving slightly each day.
The doctor is keen to get my dad sitting so they can at least get him into a wheel chair. They sat him on the edge of the bed this morning for a while, so when I arrived for a visit today he was fast asleep.
Tiring work hey.



Another reason my brother had to go back was that his visa was about to expire. I spent about an hour on the hour to the UK Home Office trying to get them an appointment the day they arrived back. Luckily because they had a child, customs was kind to them.

Angelina was our african mother. Our live-in maid who brought us kids up. I was very close to her and missed her dearly when she passed away. I like to think that Angelina is still watching over our family.

Thursday, July 31, 2008

Monday, 31 July 2006

Just finished watching Closer. B and G left today. Dad was nice and awake this evening. Anaesthetist was more positive, they want to start putting dad into a chair. That's good. So he can get fresh air. Thank you for continuing to heal my dad. Thank you for helping me to sort out my brothers appointment. Thank you for all the strength. Please keep sending healing energy and love.

My brother and his wife had to fly back to the UK. Four weeks of no work, no pay. But things weren't as critical as before.

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Sunday, 30 July 2006

Well 4 weeks you could say. Had a really good visit this morning, Dr Mills is very positive about dad's recovery. He is getting more himself each day, although I think he realises now sick he is and how weak he has become. I am positive that things are going onward and upward. We bumped into the anesthetist, 'Mr Hope for the Best' and he is still not too positive. I realise that anything may happen, geez, they could discharge dad and he could get hit by a bus.
It's of no use focusing our energy on what could happen. All I know is that my dad is getting stronger each day, and we will have to show him how strong the Fisher constitution is. My dad is good at this, he has done it before and this is not his time. He has too much to live for.

Mills said that dad can have boiled sweets, but dad is not taking any chances :-)
Thank you for strengthening my dad, and healing him from the inside. Please can my dads bowel heal so that there is no chance of infection and that his abdomen can heal rapidly.
Please keep his room free from bugs and other nasties that could weaken my dad further.
Thank you for caring and sending down your light to heal and fill the room with love.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Saturday, 29 July 2006

My dad. They changed the dressing again today. Mills removed some stitches and the found the leak. He inserted 2 catheters to speed up the drying out.
Dad is still so weak. Very little talking and he is clearly tired.
It doesn't help that the nurses don't seem to know what they need to know.
Lord, please help to drain my fathers wound, so that the tears can heal and then his abdomen can close nicely. I really want my dad to start getting stronger.
Thank you for giving is strength and for giving my dad strength.
Lord, please continue sending the healing energy of the Holy Spirit to help my dad. A bubble of white light that will surround him and protect him.
And Angelina can stay too, I think the nurses need some guidance too at the moment. Thanks be to all the angels who are helping us through this difficult time. We will continue to be strong.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Friday, 28 July 2006

Good visit today, he was a bit tired. Tina's 2nd day. Arrived late tonight, drinks at work, Kerins resignation etc. Dad looking tired, feeling clammy. He's not keen on Goodness, I think her name is. He calls her a 'lighty'. Plus the calculations for fluids in/fluids out were not correct. An anesthetist was around too, he said 'we're hoping for the best'. Aren't we all? I'm doing more than that, I'm praying for the best. I have angels, spirit guides and friends watching over my dad and helping him heal from the inside. I pray tonight for the Lord to strengthen my dad so that his temperature will normalise. Thank you for all the strength you have given us. Thank you Lord.
We love you dad, sleep tight, keep getting stronger.

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Thursday, 27 July 2006

Dads still doing good. Brushed his teeth today. The vacuum is sucking away. He is about 70% aware. So all good, Removed naso-gastro tube today.
He's still frail, but he is doing good.
Thank you for keeping him strong, please continue to help him heal. Thank you so much for today, it was a good day. I really felt it. Work, everything, the burden is lightening.
Thank you Lord for giving me strength.
I couldn't have done this on my own.
Thank you.

Subject: update
Date: Thu, 27 Jul 2006 14:32:10 +0200

Sorry I haven't updated in a while, but things seem to change daily

so it's hard to say exactly how things are going.

Yesterday the blood cultures from friday came back and my dad is

clear from infection at the moment. They gave him another blood
transfusion yesterday and the wound care specialist has fitted a
special vacuum to help clear and heal his wound. Doctor seems happy
with the progress so far. Hopefully he will continue getting stronger each day, I look forward to him being transferred out of ICU, so that we know he is properly on the road to recovery. As weak as he is, he is finding the energy to complain, and that's always a good sign.



I made a decision that I would keep up the daily visits during work hours, at least until my dad was out of ICU. Until then we couldn't be sure that he was out of the woods.

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Wednesday, 26 July 2006

Wow, after a worrisome day, it feels like I can exhale finally! The tests came back clear! Glory to God in the highest. Thank you for having mercy on us. Please continue to strengthen my dad so that we aren't held back by further setbacks. Its so good to spend time with dad and see him improving. Thank you so much.
As for the ex, he really is a confused person, after jolling for 6 weeks and barely giving me a second thought he wants to know where he stands. I really don't have time for nonsense, I'm just not bothered. I'm just so relieved that my dad is fine. I hope he will grow in strength each day so that he does not get any more infections. I am also positive that the vacuum pump will be the best thing for his wound. I am thankful for this day. I am thankful that our God is a kind and gracious god. Please help me to stay focussed, especially with all these odd jobs.
I want my life to stay simple now. I prefer this.

Friday, July 25, 2008

Thursday, 25 July 2006

Had a good visit this evening. This morning dad was quite sleepy, they had sedated him during the night and so he was quite relaxed and slept well all day. It was really nice to be able to talk to Dad and spend time with him. He seemed a lot more aware of things tonight. He reckons he has told mom he'll stay till friday, just one more week and then she can sign him out. Then he has done his bit… He says he'll be fine at home, he's done this before.
Lord, tonight I pray with all my heart that you can have mercy on my dad. Please help heal his blood and his temperature. Please lord, please can the candida be gone. Please strengthen my father so that he can fight all these challenges. Please send down the healing light of the Holy Spirit to rid my father of pain and illness. I pray to you Lord. Please send your special angels and our Angelina to nurse my dad into good health. He so wants to get better, and he can with your help. I ask this in your name. Amen.

Subject: Re: Re:

Date: Tue, 25 Jul 2006 15:26:01 +0200

As for my dad, I just get so frustrated. We thought he was doing

better but yesterday when my mom spoke to the doctor all he could say is that my dad is a very sick man. He has been saying that for 3 weeks dammit! And then he mentions that the septicemia has cleared up - he NEVER told us there was septicemia! I just get pissed off cos they need to let us know whats going on, you know? He has been
running a temp for nearly 2 weeks and they don't friggin know why! At the moment I am relying more on prayers than doctors.


Thursday, July 24, 2008

Monday, 24 July 2006

I am so angry and frustrated, I feel like the doctor isn't coming to the party. Half truths and telling us what suits them. I just feel so angry because this is serious. This is my dad's life! I want to know whats wrong now, not in 5 days when its being treated!
From 'bugs' to MRSA and 'infection' to septicemia. I just feel like they are not being straight with us. But regardless, I will be strong and be positive and pray for my father to recover and show them. Show them that faith is more valuable. Lord, please clear out my dads abdomen, please help heal his intestines and allow his wound to heal. Please help his fever come down. Please just heal my dad from the inside out. Continue strengthen him so that he can show the doctors what true healing is. Please Lord, send all your special angels to nurse and comfort my dad, so that he may make a full recovery.

Thank you for taking care of him so far, and answering our prayers. Your power is great and merciful Lord. Thank you for having mercy on us. Thank you for having mercy on us. Thank you for being a kind God.
Soothe my fathers mind tonight so that he may rest peacefully and awake to another glorious day filled with the healing light of the Holy Spirit.
Dads hands are getting stronger, he comes and goes with his clarity. But he is still tired. He is in good care though.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Sunday, 23 July 2006

Met Dr R today. He explained the tear in dads abdomen and how they are allowing it to drain and dry out and it should repair itself. Dads vitals are doing better, hr down etc. Even the anesthetist agreed that dad wasn't looking good yesterday. But he is stronger-ish. Still thin and and weak, but he is better than yesterday. I pray that all the muck can drain out of my dad and his abdomen can dry out and heal. I pray that he will continue to grow stronger each day. I pray that the candida will clear up real soon.
Thank you Lord for answering my prayers, thank you for giving us strength. Thank you. Please continue to help our family during this difficult time. Amen.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Saturday, 22 July 2006

This morning was a difficult visit, dad was looking so weak and the smell from the draining fluid was so awful. I was really frightened. But this evening was heaps better (not without the help of some prayer :-) ). Dads looking better, he was chatting to the nurse, telling her our names. Fighting to get the mask off cause it was making him claustrophobic. Only thing still worrying me was the sleep and the smell. Thandi came and spoke to us and explained that it is so good that dad is off the ventilator, and it will take a while for him to normalise his sleep etc. She is also glad that Dr R is taking over, she says he is really on the ball. So I'm confident that things are on track. The power of prayer. Healing my dad from within. Lord please continue strengthening my dad. Thank you for the peace you have given us all.

Monday, July 21, 2008

Friday, 21 July 2006

MRSA is clear, but dad hasn't slept in 3 days. Starting to struggle with his breathing and they will put him back on the ventilator if they have to. They also picked up candida in his wound. I pray that its not in his blood. Sat with him for 2 hours this afternoon so he rested a bit, but he doesn't seem himself. Spoke to the nurse as well, which was nice to see his point of view.
Oh and his temp had come down an inkling. Good news.
Lord please allow my dad the rest he needs. Please strengthen him to get through this stage of healing. Please help him stay strong.

I spoke to the studio head and she let me go off for the afternoon to sit with dad and let him sleep a bit. He was starting to look wide (and wild eyed). So I held his hand and told him that he could sleep and I would watch over him. I chatted with his nurse for a bit. She told about what it was like when she used to work in a government hospital. How the ICU is 5 times the size and the patients are much worse, usually from horrific car accidents. She really battled in that environment because she saw a lot of patients who would be improving, dying because of negligence. And it would get swept under the carpet.
She also said that Dad had said that we don't really care about him. That we are only here because he is sick and otherwise wouldn't give him a second thought.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Thursday, 20 July 2006

They took the tracheotomy out today. Great news. Was able to chat to dad today, tell him what he had been through, how long he has been in ICU. A bit delirious, but this evening was worse, he was really out of it, and slurring too. They wanted to try change change his nurse cos he is so paranoid he won't sleep.
Maria cooked us an amazing dinner. Really tasty and delicious. Sushi, pea soup, spinach feta lasagne, chocolate pudding. Really stunning. Lovely to see the girls again and chat about interesting stuff.
Still worried about my dad, I hope he gets better soon. Lord please help heal him from the inside out.

Subject: Re: hi!

Date: Thu, 20 Jul 2006 10:04:55 +0200

Hey there,

Dad is doing better, awake now and although he can't talk is full of
nonsense. He is off the ventilator, but they will see how it goes before they remove the tracheotomy. He is still weak, and we have to wait for the cultures to come back before we know what's up with the infections.


Dad was convinced that his nurse had a knife and was gonna try stab him during the night. With all the hectic pain meds and antibiotics he was on, his mind was completely addled. So strange.

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Wednesday, 19 July 2006

This morning dad was asking for soda water and trying to pull off the vent tube.
This evening he was off the ventilator and a lot more positive. Smiling, asking about Nathan. Apparently earlier he was throwing the stress ball at the large day nurse. All in all, very positive. I really just need the peace of mind that the infections have cleared up and his wound is healing. That is all I need.
Please Lord continue to heal my father from the inside out. Thank you so much for bringing us this far. Please heal my father and take away his pain. Thank you for kindness. Thanks to all the angels, but your work is not yet complete. Please continue to spread the good.

Friday, July 18, 2008

Tuesday, 18 July 2006

Dads first comment tonight was that he 'wants to come home TONIGHT' and that hospitals are shit. That pretty much set the tone for the rest of the visit. I am actually afraid for when the ventilator comes off. He is gonna have so much to say, and the fact that he can make us feel so shit without saying a word sucks. Cheeky man.
Mom is getting full of it too. It seems the more dad improves, the more annoyed she gets.

Ag, the more things change, the more they stay the same. Anyway.

I pray tonight that the tests can come back clear. Good riddance to the infections. Dad is doing great to be breathing on his own too. I don't know if he realises how bad things were. The wound worries me quietly. Where is all that fluid coming from? Why? When will it stop?

Please can you heal my father from the inside out. From his heart to his tummy to his whole attitude. Please cleanse and heal. Amen.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Monday, 17 July 2006

Boy was dad pissed off tonight. He just wanted water but he is so frustrated. Then the nurse gave him like 2ml. He was so pissed off with her. Its funny, but it must be terrible. He must be bored to tears with our rambling on. But I guess what can we do. I will continue praying that the infection clears up rapidly and he can come off the ventilator. Please help heal my father. Thank you Lord for listening to our prayers. Heal his wound. Please.

Subject: update
Date: Mon, 17 Jul 2006 12:09:13 +0200

Hi there peops,

Visited my dad this morning, they have slowly been reducing my dad's
sedatives and now he is awake. It is a difficult stage because although he can see us and hear us, he is not able to communicate clearly. I can tell he isn't 100% comfortable, but until he improves there is little that can be done.
From a few yes/no questions today I
managed to figure out that they hadn't brushed his teeth this morning, and he wanted them to do it. He was also asking for water.
Can you imagine your mouth being dry and not being able to say 'hey,
gimme some water'.
Doctor says we just need to be patient and let the antibiotics work.
As long as he is not deteriorating then it's all good. Keep sending positive thoughts…